[A couple months ago it might have surprised her that Ignis knows where she is or how to find her even in his condition. Pretty much noting about him surprises her anymore. He'd have been a better Glaive than most.
She isn't very good at finding peace, but a couple of the others have told her they hope she does. She did her best not to snap at them. After the unsettling things she'd seen in those mirrors, she has been on edge, and she jumps a little when Ignis starts speaking.
And that's embarrassing.
But he has a lantern and a little bit of humor.]
With just the lighting part? Or-
[The answer was already yes. She's looking to see if he punched braille-style holes in the paper or something.]
[Which is to say no, it isn't just about the actual lighting, but he knows better than to pitch this as some way to bring her some semblance of peace. Aside from that, it is for the both of them. They both have people they're missing, and Ignis, too, would like to honor Nyx's service and sacrifice, even if a lantern might mean little to the man himself.
Ignis appreciates the sacrifice Nyx had made more than most, he supposes, though he himself had somehow been fortunate enough to survive. He's sorry that Nyx had not been so lucky.]
The writing bit I should be able to manage, so long as you point me in the right direction.
[His hands still work just fine, even if his eyes don't.]
[In the space of a day she has seen Nyx choose to die, watched and felt herself start to die again, thrown torchless fire into the blaze while trying to feel nothing at all...and she looked at lanterns but didn't go for them. In secret Crowe likes the solemnity of ceremony, the strictness and adherence and symbolism it entails.
All the death and loss and grief surrounding it is what she hates. Public mourning isn't her gig.
As long as Ignis doesn't invite her into one of those damned mirror rooms. She doesn't want to know what she would see - and whether he could see it, too.]
So if you end up writing all over somebody's coat you're going to blame me.
[Not to worry, Crowe. He's not terribly interested in visiting those, either— he knows all too well what could happen, now that word about those rooms has gotten out. Even without his sight, the experience promises to be... unpleasant.
He smiles faintly.]
Precisely. I'll need a scapegoat.
[As though that were actually a concern.]
My first Selenium was shortly after my initial arrival in this world. At the time, I had a great deal of mourning to do, myself. The ceremony of the occasion brought me a certain degree of peace.
[Crowe is no dummy. She sighs audibly, forced. It's extra loud for Ignis's benefit, because he can't see her looking frustrated or shaking her head.]
Why is anybody so wrapped up in me finding peace?
[She is not angry, at least not here and now out loud in Ignis's direction. At her wits' end, instead, tugging the tails of exasperation, Crowe means to seek Ignis's input as an observer.]
King Regis does this all the time. It's all over his face when he thinks I've done something, I guess, worth him being proud of or some other bullshit like that.
[And in another life it would be really touching. It still kind of is. But she can't work out how to tell him to stop when she can't even explain what it is he starts.]
[Though apparently it doesn't seem so to Crowe, or else she wouldn't have asked. He reaches out to clout her on the shoulder with one hand, retracting it a moment later.]
People want to help those they care about. It would be naive to think that such care could be enough to banish anyone's troubles, but our bonds give us strength. The same could be said for any display of pride he may give. Are you so surprised that he cares for you?
[His smile pulls just a touch to one side.]
Whether you like it or not, Crowe, we're a family.
[Of course people want to help those they care about. Which is why if Regis really got that he'd know that what helps Crowe is to just get on with things as they are, rather than focusing too hard on what has and will happen and whose fault it is and whether she wants to "talk about it" (she doesn't) (he hasn't offered, it just shares sentiment with the rest).
But Ignis has, apparently, also noticed the proud-of-you waves that pop up whenever she does something "normal" or whatever. There've been less of those lately, maybe Regis is used to it.
Crowe is tired of it.
She huffs and crosses her arms and looks somewhere else and sighs out the next potential huff.]
They deserve lanterns. [Nyx. Regis. Noctis, even. She reaches for whatever writing implement is nearest.]
[He's the one who had left them the most recently, but Ignis fully intends to sent lanterns for Noctis and King Regis as well, as perverse as it might seem to mourn them while they're still here.
They deserve his respects, and the bonds he shares with them are to be honored.]
I think it's only fitting that he go first.
[The loss is still raw and recent for Crowe, and maybe this will do little to help, but the tradition itself is still lovely.]
[She hasn't said it since the week he left. No reason to talk about him, really, and nobody she wanted to talk with, or things she felt like saying.
When the lantern for him is assembled, named, and ready for a fire, she gives it back to Ignis to hold onto, while she lights it. Glaives never need matches or lighters.
The flame is small and stark even inside the lantern, since the rest of the world is wilderness-dark around them. Crowe lets her hand drop. Nyx Ulric is clearly visible in ink against the flickering paper.
Ignis didn't ask. But she'll show him anyway for a minute.]
[Ignis holds it steady as Crowe uses her own talents to spark the flame, and he feels the rising heat once it's lit. He can't see the soft glow of the lantern against the darkness, but he remembers what it was like last year, only a few short weeks after his arrival in Verens. Last Selenium had come with a number of hard truths, things he hadn't quite been prepared to face, but now—
Now, he has made peace with those truths well enough to be able to observe the traditions of this somber occasion for his own.
When the image comes through, he smiles faintly, wistful. There aren't many who use the crystals to give him glimpses of the world around him, but he appreciates that Crowe isn't shy about sharing what she feels is important.]
Lovely. [He means that.] Would you like to send it up?
[It's right that she be the one to do it, he thinks.]
[No. She doesn't want sending it up to be necessary. It could just as easily be her name on this lantern and she knows it.]
Sure.
[Her life is made of doing shit she doesn't want to be necessary.
Crowe picks up the lantern, which has sufficient heat to want to rise on its own, takes a step into a bit of clearer space, and lets it go. Ignis can see that for a minute or two, too, until it's high enough and off course enough that she can't quite tell it apart from the others.
She swallows and pretends it wasn't thick and didn't feel like anything.]
He lost his sister when the Niffs came, years ago. [A quiet scoff.] He'd kill me for telling you.
[As though Nyx were here to learn of it, anyway. He watches as the lantern floats upwards, disappearing among all the rest, becoming just another bright mark against the night sky. The image fades, and he he shakes his head slightly as he reaches to lay a hand on her shoulder.]
I know this changes little. [It doesn't bring anyone back, and it does little to ease the ache, but:] I wanted to pay my respects, as well.
[Somewhere she lost the habit of shrugging him off.]
Probably steal the lantern and draw- obscene shit all over it. [If both of her best friends were there they'd have done this together, or to each other, or to make Crowe snap at them both while they grinned like the idiots they are. Dumb faces and other less acceptable 'art' all over the paper lanterns. She can almost see it like it's real.
They were serious over the deaths of friends, in silent and solemn formation, expressionless. But they could joke about each other dying with an ease Crowe always hated.]
Thanks. [For thinking of Nyx beside all the other, more personally important people Ignis will lose. For thinking of her, though she will never ever admit it.]
[He'd known Nyx for so short a time in comparison, and they weren't close by any means, but Ignis had still considered himself to be, in some way, responsible for all those who came to this place from Eos. His natural inclination to look after his friends had extended to the Glaives as well, whether or not they cared for it. He's grateful that Crowe has come to accept his brand of friendship, and can only hope that Nyx found some value in it during his time here, as well.]
You needn't thank me.
[He shakes his head.]
At least not until we've finished the evening out with a stiff drink.
[He thinks they could both use one to round out the festivities.]
They have that? I got warned about whatever's in the punch.
["Warned" in this case defined as "someone's drink was talking back to them and I could hear it while sober". Just in case she's finally cracked, she won't be sharing that with Ignis out of the blue.]
Besides, you've got more of that to do. [A nod at his other lanterns. She's sure he can hear it.] Unless you want to be alone.
[That has no guilt in it. Some things aren't for sharing.]
Theasthai is a large city, after all, but I remember not having to wander too far from the festival grounds to find something sufficiently potent last year.
[He and Noct had received a visit from Regis' spirit then, before he'd ever made an appearance in Verens. Drinking had been a necessity— but he pauses to consider before nodding.
Yes, perhaps.]
I think the last few may require a bit of privacy, yes.
[He knows how he's going to end up before the night is over, and he doesn't want her to see that.]
[Now that he promised it she won't let him off the hook!
She does sneak a look at his other lanterns, just once. Just to see. Whatever is written on them isn't her business to comment on, but she wants to know anyway.]
And yell if you need somebody to drag you home, after that.
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2018-02-05 02:44 pm (UTC)She isn't very good at finding peace, but a couple of the others have told her they hope she does. She did her best not to snap at them. After the unsettling things she'd seen in those mirrors, she has been on edge, and she jumps a little when Ignis starts speaking.
And that's embarrassing.
But he has a lantern and a little bit of humor.]
With just the lighting part? Or-
[The answer was already yes. She's looking to see if he punched braille-style holes in the paper or something.]
no subject
Date: 2018-02-08 04:57 am (UTC)[Which is to say no, it isn't just about the actual lighting, but he knows better than to pitch this as some way to bring her some semblance of peace. Aside from that, it is for the both of them. They both have people they're missing, and Ignis, too, would like to honor Nyx's service and sacrifice, even if a lantern might mean little to the man himself.
Ignis appreciates the sacrifice Nyx had made more than most, he supposes, though he himself had somehow been fortunate enough to survive. He's sorry that Nyx had not been so lucky.]
The writing bit I should be able to manage, so long as you point me in the right direction.
[His hands still work just fine, even if his eyes don't.]
no subject
Date: 2018-02-08 03:43 pm (UTC)All the death and loss and grief surrounding it is what she hates. Public mourning isn't her gig.
As long as Ignis doesn't invite her into one of those damned mirror rooms. She doesn't want to know what she would see - and whether he could see it, too.]
So if you end up writing all over somebody's coat you're going to blame me.
no subject
Date: 2018-02-17 10:27 pm (UTC)He smiles faintly.]
Precisely. I'll need a scapegoat.
[As though that were actually a concern.]
My first Selenium was shortly after my initial arrival in this world. At the time, I had a great deal of mourning to do, myself. The ceremony of the occasion brought me a certain degree of peace.
[He, too, has a soft spot for symbolism.]
no subject
Date: 2018-02-22 05:25 pm (UTC)Why is anybody so wrapped up in me finding peace?
[She is not angry, at least not here and now out loud in Ignis's direction. At her wits' end, instead, tugging the tails of exasperation, Crowe means to seek Ignis's input as an observer.]
King Regis does this all the time. It's all over his face when he thinks I've done something, I guess, worth him being proud of or some other bullshit like that.
[And in another life it would be really touching. It still kind of is. But she can't work out how to tell him to stop when she can't even explain what it is he starts.]
I just- why?
no subject
Date: 2018-02-23 06:06 pm (UTC)[Though apparently it doesn't seem so to Crowe, or else she wouldn't have asked. He reaches out to clout her on the shoulder with one hand, retracting it a moment later.]
People want to help those they care about. It would be naive to think that such care could be enough to banish anyone's troubles, but our bonds give us strength. The same could be said for any display of pride he may give. Are you so surprised that he cares for you?
[His smile pulls just a touch to one side.]
Whether you like it or not, Crowe, we're a family.
no subject
Date: 2018-02-26 08:01 pm (UTC)But Ignis has, apparently, also noticed the proud-of-you waves that pop up whenever she does something "normal" or whatever. There've been less of those lately, maybe Regis is used to it.
Crowe is tired of it.
She huffs and crosses her arms and looks somewhere else and sighs out the next potential huff.]
They deserve lanterns. [Nyx. Regis. Noctis, even. She reaches for whatever writing implement is nearest.]
Who first?
no subject
Date: 2018-03-01 06:52 pm (UTC)[He's the one who had left them the most recently, but Ignis fully intends to sent lanterns for Noctis and King Regis as well, as perverse as it might seem to mourn them while they're still here.
They deserve his respects, and the bonds he shares with them are to be honored.]
I think it's only fitting that he go first.
[The loss is still raw and recent for Crowe, and maybe this will do little to help, but the tradition itself is still lovely.]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-02 07:53 pm (UTC)[She hasn't said it since the week he left. No reason to talk about him, really, and nobody she wanted to talk with, or things she felt like saying.
When the lantern for him is assembled, named, and ready for a fire, she gives it back to Ignis to hold onto, while she lights it. Glaives never need matches or lighters.
The flame is small and stark even inside the lantern, since the rest of the world is wilderness-dark around them. Crowe lets her hand drop. Nyx Ulric is clearly visible in ink against the flickering paper.
Ignis didn't ask. But she'll show him anyway for a minute.]
All set.
no subject
Date: 2018-03-09 09:00 pm (UTC)Now, he has made peace with those truths well enough to be able to observe the traditions of this somber occasion for his own.
When the image comes through, he smiles faintly, wistful. There aren't many who use the crystals to give him glimpses of the world around him, but he appreciates that Crowe isn't shy about sharing what she feels is important.]
Lovely. [He means that.] Would you like to send it up?
[It's right that she be the one to do it, he thinks.]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-12 07:37 pm (UTC)Sure.
[Her life is made of doing shit she doesn't want to be necessary.
Crowe picks up the lantern, which has sufficient heat to want to rise on its own, takes a step into a bit of clearer space, and lets it go. Ignis can see that for a minute or two, too, until it's high enough and off course enough that she can't quite tell it apart from the others.
She swallows and pretends it wasn't thick and didn't feel like anything.]
He lost his sister when the Niffs came, years ago. [A quiet scoff.] He'd kill me for telling you.
no subject
Date: 2018-03-18 12:54 am (UTC)[As though Nyx were here to learn of it, anyway. He watches as the lantern floats upwards, disappearing among all the rest, becoming just another bright mark against the night sky. The image fades, and he he shakes his head slightly as he reaches to lay a hand on her shoulder.]
I know this changes little. [It doesn't bring anyone back, and it does little to ease the ache, but:] I wanted to pay my respects, as well.
no subject
Date: 2018-03-20 01:52 pm (UTC)[Somewhere she lost the habit of shrugging him off.]
Probably steal the lantern and draw- obscene shit all over it. [If both of her best friends were there they'd have done this together, or to each other, or to make Crowe snap at them both while they grinned like the idiots they are. Dumb faces and other less acceptable 'art' all over the paper lanterns. She can almost see it like it's real.
They were serious over the deaths of friends, in silent and solemn formation, expressionless. But they could joke about each other dying with an ease Crowe always hated.]
Thanks. [For thinking of Nyx beside all the other, more personally important people Ignis will lose. For thinking of her, though she will never ever admit it.]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-26 12:49 am (UTC)[He'd known Nyx for so short a time in comparison, and they weren't close by any means, but Ignis had still considered himself to be, in some way, responsible for all those who came to this place from Eos. His natural inclination to look after his friends had extended to the Glaives as well, whether or not they cared for it. He's grateful that Crowe has come to accept his brand of friendship, and can only hope that Nyx found some value in it during his time here, as well.]
You needn't thank me.
[He shakes his head.]
At least not until we've finished the evening out with a stiff drink.
[He thinks they could both use one to round out the festivities.]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-26 03:30 pm (UTC)["Warned" in this case defined as "someone's drink was talking back to them and I could hear it while sober". Just in case she's finally cracked, she won't be sharing that with Ignis out of the blue.]
Besides, you've got more of that to do. [A nod at his other lanterns. She's sure he can hear it.] Unless you want to be alone.
[That has no guilt in it. Some things aren't for sharing.]
no subject
Date: 2018-04-03 07:32 pm (UTC)[He'd caught wind of that warning, as well.]
Theasthai is a large city, after all, but I remember not having to wander too far from the festival grounds to find something sufficiently potent last year.
[He and Noct had received a visit from Regis' spirit then, before he'd ever made an appearance in Verens. Drinking had been a necessity— but he pauses to consider before nodding.
Yes, perhaps.]
I think the last few may require a bit of privacy, yes.
[He knows how he's going to end up before the night is over, and he doesn't want her to see that.]
no subject
Date: 2018-04-04 07:08 pm (UTC)[Now that he promised it she won't let him off the hook!
She does sneak a look at his other lanterns, just once. Just to see. Whatever is written on them isn't her business to comment on, but she wants to know anyway.]
And yell if you need somebody to drag you home, after that.
no subject
Date: 2018-04-07 05:39 am (UTC)Yours will be the first name I call.
[Cross his heart.]
Now, shall we?
[He smiles faintly, offering her his arm.]
no subject
Date: 2018-04-09 07:10 am (UTC)If you know where you're going, I'll keep the trees out of the way.